Are we outside again?

How cute is Bronte's official soccer picture???

Bronte played in a soccer tournament today. It was a lovely day for a soccer tourney...50 degrees, gray, drizzly. The kids were fine but I was miserable. I hate being cold. I was in my chair, wrapped up in my blanket, thanking God that only one of my children is athletic. Brenna is like me, she only likes to do outdoor things in ideal weather.

I hope that someday Brenna finds someone who is independently wealthy to take care of her as she is not equipped what-so-ever to deal with adversity. Good thing she is smart, pretty and talented. She also has this sweet, unassuming way about her that people are just attracted to. No doubt she will do well in her dating career.

So, back to the soccer tournament. Bronte plays in something called the soccer "Academy". It's for kids who are too young to play on the hard-core travel teams but still are hard-core and don't want to just be on a soccer team for the cool shirt and the end of the year pizza party. Bronte LOVES soccer. She particularly loves playing defense because it's a good excuse to throw an elbow or two or to trip a kid under the guise of trying to get the ball. The kid is aggressive. Push her and she will push right back, no matter how big the opponent.

Brenna and Bronte couldn't be more different.

Brenna takes ballet. Bronte takes hip-hop.
Brenna's favorite movie is Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. Bronte's favorite movie is Iron Man.
Brenna is afraid of all bugs, even butterflies. Bronte likes to carry Cicadas around and would like to keep one in her room.
Brenna is very polite and soft-spoken. Bronte's two favorite phrases are, "That sucks!" and "Holy Crap!"

I love my kids. I love that they are so different. When I was pregnant with Bronte I prayed to have a boy because I didn't think I could ever love another daughter as much as I love Brenna. Well, God had different plans. He gave me another daughter but made her so dissimilar to her sister that I love her with the same intensity for completely different reasons. It's funny how I can see myself in both of my girls even though they aren't that much alike. Bronte loves to write, for Brenna it is a chore. Brenna loves to sing and is good at it, Bronte....not so much. Bronte likes to know what everyone is talking about but Brenna only cares if it directly pertains to her. Brenna loves to read and can get lost in a book for hours but Bronte has to be TOLD to read.
Of all the things that I have accomplished in my life, my girls are the thing I am most proud of. I always used to think that I was too selfish to be a parent. When I was in college I couldn't fathom spending my money on anything but shoes for ME, ME, ME!!! Now I work so that my kids can play travel soccer and take 5 dance classes a week and have fabulous birthday parties. I realized the other day that I spend more on piano lessons for my kids than I did on my last pair of jeans. Not only that, I haven't had a new pair of jeans in two years or more.
Oh well, I wouldn't have it any other way.

I'm bringing sexy back

I just want everyone to know that THIS is what I look like when I am just lounging around the house. I wear my robe, my fabulous Betsey Johnson shoes (those bitches are HOT) and my tiara. How about those shoes? They are suede and they are fabulous! I never would have spent money on something so incredibly frivolous, but I got them from my fairy Godfather...I don't know how he knew I needed them, but he did.

Last week was (as usual) an extremely busy one. I had to go to my stupid ass job and come home and make dinner and get kids to their various activities. I haven't had a minute to do anything I want to do; read the paper, go to the gym, eat a meal while sitting at the table...you know. Friday was the one day I was looking forward to because my husband and I had tickets to go see k.d. lang and I LOVE her. However, my Friday schedule looked like this:

6:30 a.m. Get up and get ready for work. Kiss my kids goodbye before school.

8:00 a.m. Get my can of soup and go to work.

1:00 p.m. Leave work and go home to make dinner and put it in the Crock Pot so it would be ready for my kids and my parents who were coming in to baby sit so I could go to the concert.

2:00 Pick up Brenna and her friend from school and take Brenna to piano lessons, take her friend home, go to pick up Bronte from school, get her to piano lessons and write a check to the piano teacher for lessons.

4:00 p.m. Get home and get dressed for the concert.

4:30 p.m. Leave home and get to my mother-in-law's friend's house for the limo to take us into Chicago for the concert.

However, when I was leaving the house to go get Brenna and her friend I saw that I had a package waiting outside my front door. It was addressed to me from my friend Jim in California. I grabbed it and got in the car to go to the Jr. High to get Brenna. When I got to the school I opened the package and inside were THE SHOES. More importantly, there was a note from my friend Jim. He told me that the shoes were beautiful and that he had also enclosed some other fun things, including the tiara. You see, on his blog he has a picture of himself in a tiara:
When I saw this photo on his blog I told him that if I had a tiara I would wear it everywhere, even to the grocery store. SOOOOO, in my package there were THE SHOES and my very own tiara. He told me that he expected to see some very amusing photos of me wearing it very soon.

So here I am getting out of the limo wearing my tiara. Nothing says "of course I took a limo to a k.d. lang concert" like a tiara. Between that and my vintage mohair coat I felt like a princess. (I am not the queen though. Jim is. Look at how he wears his tiara at a jaunty angle. Only a queen can get away with that!)
In any case, I wore that tiara all weekend. I love it. I will share more pics of the tiara later...but if you ever get the chance, get a really heavy tiara and wear it as much as you can. It makes everything better.
Now, here is the thing about Jim. I have never met him. All he knows for sure about me is that I wear size 8 shoes. He reads my blog and I read his. We swap emails and we know stuff about each other...but he has never even heard my voice! But that package on Friday from my fairy Godfather made my day, my week, my year! Because I struggle (as most women do) with my body image, he once told me that I should watch Carson Kressly's show "How To Look Good Naked". Well, let me tell you, Carson has NOTHING on Jim. That box with the shoes and the tiara made me feel like more than just someones mom, or a financial aid specialist, or an ordinary suburban dweller. That box made me feel like a princess.
If I didn't express it before...Thank you, Jim. You are a man among men. I can't wait to show you how fabulous those shoes look on me. IN PERSON!!
Incidentally, the funny thing about the picture at the top where I am wearing my robe and tiara and SHOES...Brenna took it. Tony was watching the Bears vs. Vikings game.

Pretty Vacant

Things that I hate about Sarah Palin:


1. When she was being interviewed by Charles Gibson she kept calling him "Charlie" in her nasal-y annoying accent. Hello! He doesn't go by the name Charlie when he is doing a serious interview. Did she blow him backstage or something which made her feel as though she had the right to use his informal name? I think it pissed him off too because he kept asking her harder and harder questions and asking her to clarify what the fuck she was talking about. At one point he asked her a question twice because he said when she answered it the first time he got "lost in a blizzard of words". She's such an idiot...if she wants the press to be nice to her I see a LOT of gratuitous blow jobs in her future.

2. I hate her glasses. If she were a real hands-on mom to a 5 month old, she would NEVER be able to wear those glasses because her kid would rip them off and destroy them in 2 seconds. Also, as my friend Vicky pointed out, there is no discernible prescription in those glasses. So, she wears them to look smarter...? Too bad they can't actually MAKE her smarter. She's an idiot.

3. What's with that hair bubble on the top of her head? It looks like a tumor. Is she trying to look taller? If she were smarter then she could say that she just has a huge head full of brains, but she's not smart. She's an idiot.

4. Sarah? Ummm...being able to see Russia from your back porch does not make you an expert on foreign policy. Going to the UN for a day of cramming does not make you ready for the Katie Couric interview. You told Charles "Charlie" Gibson that you were a Washington outsider, right? Let me tell you why....You're an IDIOT!

5. In the Katie Couric interview Sarah Palin said about a dozen times that her answer to our economic crisis was to "shore up" the economy. What the fuck does that mean? Well, when Katie tried to get her to expound on that, Palin said that we are in "crisis mode here". Okay. Got it. So what's the answer? Apparently we just need to "shore up". Her PR guy really drove that point home. She also insinuated that people are losing their houses because they were "irresponsible". Really? Ummm....she's an idiot.

I can't wait to see the vice presidential debate. Maybe I will take a drink every time she says "shore up" or "crisis mode". Nah, I have to work on Friday and I really don't want to have a hangover.
In the end here are a few more things I think...
Charlie Gibson is smarter than Sarah Palin.
Katie Couric is smarter than Sarah Palin.
Tina Fey is smarter than Sarah Palin. (So is Amy Poehler)

I can't believe we (as Americans) are even tempted to vote for a ticket with this woman on it. I have been accused of being anti-woman because I don't back her. Well, I am pro-woman. That is why I am NOT voting for Palin who thinks abortion should be illegal even in the case of rape or incest. I am pro-woman because I won't vote for a woman (who, according to some people, represent women all over America) who is going to be more of a laughing stock as a VP than Dan Quayle was. I am pro-woman because I don't back a woman who thinks God sanctions the war in Iraq.
Also, what's up with her kid's names? Track? Trig? C'mon.