Monday, December 4, 2006

Delusions of Grandeur

I was looking at myself in the rearview mirror the other day. Unfortunately, because I am so busy running the household and raising two demanding children (by the way, are all children demanding, or are mine just really gifted in that area?) the only time I ever get to look at myself in the mirror is in the car. Anyway, I was looking at myself and thought, "Gee, I look pretty good." That led my to my next thought, "Okay, do I really look good, or are my standards slipping?"

You see, I think I still look like I did when I was in college. I think I'm about the same size. However, this cannot be proven beyond a reasonable doubt as I no longer have any of my clothes from college. May darling husband, on the other hand, still has clothes from high school, I think. Whenever I get a call from the Vietnam Vets telling me that there is going to be a truck in our neighborhood so could I possibly donate a bag of old clothes, my husband starts to sweat. Why should I get rid of that old t-shirt from his high school swing choir? It still fits!

But I digress...I think I'm about the same size I was in college. My face looks the same. My hair...well, it's been a few different colors since college and it might be a little shorter, but it's in the same ponytail that I've worn for years and it will stay there until baldness becomes fashionable for women. (That's my dream, by the way. The ultimate in low maintenance hair. Think of all the room I'd have in my bathroom without the blow drier, various brushes, gels, straighteners, hairspray, etc. Not that I ever even use these things because my ponytail is the next best thing to baldness, but I might use them someday. I do have the hair. I need to open the drawer with the hair accoutrements in it every once in a while to prove to myself that I have the technology to achieve an actual hairstyle someday.) I wear the same clothes from the Gap I wore then. Khaki's and t-shirts or jeans and a v-neck sweater never go out of style. I still listen to Adam Ant occasionally too. (He, incidentally, looks terrible. It's not like I expected him to wear make-up and pirate gear forever, but now he's some bloated has-been who is flinging carburetors though pub windows in England.)

In college I was never really satisfied with the way I looked. Other people seemed to think I looked good, but I never saw that person in the mirror. But today I see a 41 year old who looks pretty darn great. So, the ultimate question is (and it's a two-parter) did I look great in college and therefore I look great now, or did I look terrible in college, look the same now and therefore my standards have slipped?

I was looking at some old pictures of my college days with one of my best friends. She and I were inseparable at the University of Iowa, so she and I are in a lot of pictures together. So, we're looking at these pictures and she looks TOTALLY different. She's virtually unrecognizable. I mean, it's not as if her dental records would have to be admitted into evidence to i.d. her or anything...but she looks really different. I, on the other hand, look the same. Am I delusional? Or, do I not look in the mirror often enough to see how much I have changed? I mean, let's face it, you can only see so much in the rearview mirror.

Which brings me back to my epiphany in the car. After looking at myself in the rearview mirror and thinking I look pretty good, I continue on my way to the elementary school to pick up something for my friend's son. Keep in mind that my own daughters don't attend the school I am going to, I am just doing a favor for a friend who cannot physically make it to pick up this item for her son. I walk into the gym where a few dozen PTA-type moms are also there picking up things for their children. Suddenly this blonde woman walks up to me and says, "You look so familiar. Do you have children at this school?" I told her no, I was picking up something for a friend so she hadn't seen my face in those halls before. She then asks, "Where did you go to college?" I told her I went to the University of Iowa. She suddenly gets this look of recognition and asks, "Were you an Alpha Delta Pi?" I reluctantly admitted that I was for one year. She then gasps, "Oh my gosh! Carolyn Geddis! You look exactly the same." I know she told me her name and other stuff after that, but I wasn't listening. All I could think was, "I knew it! I look exactly the same!"

My conclusion from this whole experience? I am not the only one who is delusional.

51 comments:

The T-Dude said...

You are not delusional. As someone who both knew you in college and knows you now, you look great, in fact, you look even better now!

alan said...

Delusional? absolutely. Not about your looks, but many other things to lengthy to list. Having known you well in college, and having seen you recently, I can say you look pretty damn good. I do miss the longer, beautiful Strawberry blonde hair, baldness may be easy, but oh so unremarkable. Next time I see you I will have to get a better look, just so this post is accurate.

Bowjo said...

Ok, I'm so excited about what I got you for Christmas that I just may have to give it to you early. You are not any more delusional than the rest of looking in rearview mirrors or plucking hairs in our vanity ones. Maybe just a wee bit more needy in the reassurance department. Tell me you won't be checking your Blog comments a million times a day!

Unknown said...

Well, I always thought you looked good in college and I think that was generally accepted so on that point I think you are safe. Now how you look today I couldn't say since the last time I saw you you were getting married to Tony and I think some effort was spent on your appearance that day (it worked - you looked amazing). But for all I know you could be over 200 lbs now. I suspect you aren't 200 lbs as you think you might fit into your college clothes and you'd have to be seriously delusional to think that if you were now .. er.. full-figured. And now I am imagining you at over 200 lbs. Wow. What a thought. For the record: I am still pissed that you had me convinced that you were a natural blonde and that mousse would make my hair turn purple. :)

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